Mythbusters

With the new fall academic session around the corner, a few myths I feel need to be busted for people who are about to come and join various US universities.

First of all, the deal with on campus and off campus. Many of ye hopefuls might be accustomed to the fortress-like miniature city as the campus of a university, where a mighty brick and mortar fence guards the premises, and holds the sanctity intact of what you know as the 'campus'. Here in the US, however, there is rarely such a wall around the whole place. City roads often pass right through the middle of the univeristy, and the campus of the university generally is a region or a part of the city rather than a segregated block. Thus, off-campus housing doesn't mean that you are left in forlorn corners where you have to travel every day to reach the safe haven of the university. Neither does on-campus housing mean that you live in a noise-free (and noisier people free) zone. Quite the opposite, actually.

A second fancy idea that most people like to come here with is that the GRE score indicates if they will get aid, scholarship, etc. Unfortunately, it is not so. It is a complete free-for-all once you reach the university. All of us then begin from zero again. Your resume is the only thing that you can throw around and hope to find on-campus employment, etc. So whether you've landed a 1550 on the GRE or you scored a 1300 doesn't matter: being at the right place at the right time does. They don't really care what your GRE score was as soon as you touch the US soil. And financial aid is not free scholarship that you get --- you need to work as a research assistant or a teaching assistant to get the dough.

Next, it is a dream quote back home that the American people are not hardworking and that the desi junta really show them what hard work is all about. Over cups of conversation in roadside tea stalls, I have seen highly informed opinions that these people are dolts and they can't even do a single thing themselves: apparently it is all done my machines and computers. It is a very romantic idea --- I agree, like the MS Word Easter egg that was 'discovered' by some Indian engineer and "even Bill Gates" can't figure out why that happens etc. Forget it, people. I have found the Americans here to be very smart and very very hardworking. You can't even imagine the amount of hours they can put in to finish papers, the kind of lengths they go to in order to understand a single derivation of an obscure paper. Almost always their company is good and accepting --- there is a lot you can learn from them.

Finally, some people believe all they see on the movies. Hot chicks in skimpy clothes hanging at every corner and winking at you, or otherwise cool hunks waiting to propose to you from their Harley Davidsons --- sorry, they don't exist. On a typical campus, you'll find the undergrads going "Like, totally... man... I was like... dude..." and the grad students running from one end of the campus to another telling the tales of their woes to anyone and everyone who cares to listen (or at least pretends to). You would have imagined it is all a party and booze time once you land and that is what you will do most of the time once you are here. Sorry, honey --- you will spend most of your time poring over research papers and books and finishing assignments. So all ye hopefuls who dream about getting laid, sweeping others off their feet or getting swept: let those fantasies rest. You aren't getting any ;)