And they came looking for

By far, the most common keywords that redirect people to this blog relate to GRE and/or GATE, MTech admissions. Which is a good thing, since they find useful things here (hopefully). Also, the second most prolific keywords that lead here are my name. Yes, every time you search for that and come here, I know about you --- it is not exactly such covert sneaking up here, you know! But, amusingly enough, some people land here looking for 'special' things, we shall say, and I intend to answer your queries here as best as I can. Unfortunately, the stock of weird keyword searches is not as long as the ones here or here, so you will get specialized attention.

1. Bengali smell armpit --- Now, why on earth you were looking for the exact smell of Bengali armpits, I'm not sure. Maybe you need some lactatives or purgatives, maybe your mornings are not as 'yellow' as you would want them to be. Or maybe you're frustrated enough with the sample smell of armpits from all over India and you are still hunting for that hardcore stuff... I completely understand. Please don't be frustrated: as soon as you feel suicidal, you can come and smell my socks or my armpits --- they're guaranteed to be the last things you'll ever smell.

2. How do u say ur sexy in Russian --- How on earth am I supposed to know?? Oh, wait, I know! I'm too hot and handsome to be a nerd... thanks. Maybe I'm really the hunk of everyone's dreams, and you found a pic of Anna Kournikova and Maria Sharapova draped all over me. I'll tell you what, you go and get the Russian lady you wanted to pay your compliments to and bring her to me. I'll make sure that she understands it all once you leave her and a piece of paper containing your message with me. Russian privacy, you know...

3. Older woman looking for young man in Kolkata --- Ahh... since you did search for this online, I'm assuming that you must be one of the two protagonists in question. If you're the young man, I see your point. With thousands of fraanship requests spurned on Orkut, anyone who filled an 'F' in the sex column of your engineering college forms must have been the object of your 'hot' pursuits. Unfortunately, you managed to scare away even the most remotely female objects around you. Allegedly the otherwise lovely faces of some girls set into a permanent scowl because you sat in front of them for a week continuously, and they needed special face therapy to undo that damage. Therefore, you turned your attention to the more 'mature' variety of the species (hope, I know), and where else would you find such an 'older' woman but on this blog?

If, however, you were the older woman, then we shall reserve our comments for now --- that is a complete blog post in itself! :P

4. Lovely lady Kolkata --- See, I always knew that there is hope! Even if my MS and PhD dreams do not work out, I have an alternate career option --- being a pimp! Whoever came here looking for lovely ladies in Kolkata must believe that I maintain a list of all such nubile females. And all it will take on my behalf would be a simple phone call or two. The eternal quest for the 'good girl' shall end, and a good girl shall be at your doorstep within the hour: just leave your name and address with me here. Oh, and this blog can also double up as the web portal for "content management", right? Thanks for the suggestion, dear... as soon as I locate the lovely ladies from Kolkata, I'll let you know: they will be more than happy to oblige.

Thank you, dear google, yahoo and ask.com users --- you provide so much fodder for the blog cud!

Comments

  1. First comment! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

    Bengali smelly armpit indeed! I was laughing out so loud my mom thought this time I was off to the nut house for sure. Read that part to her, she found it funny enough as well :)

    Good one!

    Sky

    P.S. Are you serious that people come here looking for Bengali smelly armpit? Whats the correlation, unless of course you can also post...err...fragrances?

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  2. well the most common phrases to land on my blog are "naked aunties" or "naked *" where * cd be preity zinta, sania mirza, sharmila tagore or indian ladies or whatever.. of course they get disappointed! :P

    then a lot of ppl turn up for "Kandisa meaning"

    and a lot of them for things like "do fairies exist" or "how to call a fairy".. i tell u, this world is full of nerds!

    and of course.. i am really curious about those souls who are equally curious abt me and turn up with searches like "twilight fairy" or "twilight fairy blog" or "twilight fairy delhi" or "twilight fairy gurgaon" or "twilight fairy picture" or "twilight fairy age"!!!

    abt long time no see.. well i do keep watching from above.. (thru my feed reader :p :))

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  3. Just one query: were those search queries bang on topic when they hit your blog? :-p

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  4. Hahaha -- love it! Google/Wikipedia are my best friends too ;) Could never have passed university without them :P

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  5. "being a pimp"
    ROFL! Sounds like a good career option! You can use your blog for that you know! To hell with Google Ad-sense. If you hook up with right connections, you could be earning much more!

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  6. Sky, to get the fragrances, one will just have to travel a little south on the anatomy, thats all :D

    P.S. - Congratulations on being the first to comment: sona aapka!

    Twilight fairy, one wonders, what exactly have you portrayed as 'naked' on your blog? :D And of course, calling yourself the twilight fairy has its own advantages, doesn't it --- you can at least cast a spell around :) BTW, "twilight fairy age" ?? :D Kya baat hai madam?

    P.S. - RSS is good. I'm guilty of following a whole gamut of blogs through that as well :D

    Hari, lets hope not... although one of them put me on the very first page itself, I think.

    Princess, thanks. And yes, I too would never make it past the university without them.

    Twisted DNA, thanks... I can always count on you for such solid advice.

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  7. ohhh gawsh this is very interesting..people are now going to be less snoopy about searches now..:).

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  8. Wow... lovely new theme for your blog. Certainly gives it a different feel altogether.

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  9. nice new look...love d bird..it depicts d freedom of thought n expression...:)-Ms NMA

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  10. Time for a change eh?

    Btw lao lao phir..sona lao..

    Sky

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  11. Pallavi, well, lets hope so!

    Hari, thanks... still ironing out the details :)

    Miss NMA, long time no see. :) And however uncanny it may sound, the reasons behind me choosing this template were exactly what you wrote out there --- it was weird reading your comment.

    Sky, aap milo chat par... phir batate hain.

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  12. GROSSSOOOO~~~~~!!!!
    ( nice new layout btw~!)

    Armpits are fascinating to some people.. i didnt really know that . now i do.
    wish i didnt.

    anyways.. maybe this person wants to bottle the scent. seeing as he/she misses the smell of Panchphoron.

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  13. hehe..c,m smarter than u ;)..waise jus had a look at ur template..it goes..The chronicles of Sudipta: the man, the machine, and everything inbetween..wt on earth makes u urself a machine..lol..bet u can't answer dat..lol..dun worry bout me stopping by to comment rarely..i read all ur posts anyways :)

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  14. dat was me..Ms NMA (forgot to mention dat)

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  15. Grafxgurl, yeah... apparently they are. Hahaaha... paanchphoron will remind people of a lot of things I'm sure.

    Miss NMA, thats the tagline and it has been there for a long time --- maybe it has become a bit more prominent now. I do behave like a cold emotionless machine at times: you'll have to know me in person to believe that. And yes, for the record, I wasn't worried that you haven't been commenting of late: it was just like saying 'hi' to a friend who you saw some time back. Thanks for being such a loyal reader. :)

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  16. hey ... intersting blog buddy.. so tell me wat type do u belong to ;)

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  17. Geetanjali, first of all, thanks! Secondly, I think you put your comment on the wrong post (knowing you, why am I not surprised? :D ). Finally, as I replied to someone on that post, people predicted I'd be the father figure ;)

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