Of Universities and Girlfriends

I have been thinking (yes, I do think), that there is so much common between the little things of life, and the not-so-little things. You talk of fractals, you talk of small waves joining together to form the gigantic swirling wave, but the similarity never ends. And of course, there are universities and there are girlfriends. And yes, there is a lot common between them as well.

As for example, you start by researching the "potential" candidates out. What are the research interests of the university, where does it stand, what are the costs of living with it, and so on and so forth. Come to think of it, your potential girlfriends are also in the same category. You have to think about what her 'interests' are, how much of girlfriend/wife material she is, and of course, how much is the maintenance cost?

Then, of course, there is the consideration of whether you want to have the brand name with yourself all your life. Yeah, I am talking about the commitment bit. But, really, don't you think at the beginning of every relation that this should be the one thing that should stay with yourself all your life? What happens later is a different question, but your university brand name also sticks to you. Whether you like it or not, you have to become very very proud of yourself when you see huge praises being heaped on that university, "your university", and perhaps you will also rush to its defence when it is slandered against.

Of course none of the universities should know that you have applied to their rivals. Think, think, a tailor-made SoP for each university, praising them to the sky and explaining how precisely a 'relation' will be "mutually beneficial". Just so that you can somehow trick them into taking you in... and then the rest is history :D. Now, think of this in terms of girlfriends... need I say more? And woe befall you if the 'love-letter' (read SoP) for one reaches someone else!!

And then there is always the fear of rejection, the joy of anticipating acceptance! Of all the people you pin your hopes on (like random scrapbook frandship requests on Orkut), all the acceptances seem so heartwarming. And the rejections from those places where you think you ought to have been 'accepted' seem to rend the heart... time for crushed hearts, a little introspection and a final dejected devastated hour on some nights. It is all a part of life, dear... you just move on.

Finally, think of the categories of applications. Although there may be no "safe" applications for you in the case of girlfriends, you have some medium bets; where you think that you have done your best, and that there should not be any hassles if things go all right. But you secretly have a crush on some universities, your ambitious applications, your darkest deepest dreams think about yourself being associated with that university, of living through its campus as a student. You know that there is no way you will be taken in, there are far many better candidates who are in line for that one seat. But then, again, this may be your only chance, so that some day in life you should not look back, heave a sigh and tell yourself, "Gosh, I should at least have asked her!".

And what happens when you get a thick envelope from that university, saying you are in? What happens when she, the star with the celestial smile, says yes? Ah... Bliss, Bliss, Bliss!! :)


  1. What a maintenance cost!!! For a girlfriend? Whatever I have seen, they are free of any cost, especially in cash. Jade nahi likhungi, nahi to ....I THINK A WIFE IS COSTLY, not a girlfriend, if ones plays the cards right. But the parallel you have drawn is really facinating. :-)I WILL CERTAINLY READ THIS POST AGAIN. :-)

  2. That was one hell of a well cerebrated post. But then, what when you have more than one "hi-fi" university you wanna be associated with and lets say, all of them accept you?

    And what when one year down the line, you find better research interests in some other university and wanna shift? Here comes one difference between a university and a girl friend then. The prof from your ex university might give you a recommendation letter. Your ex girl friend won't.

  3. Alka, Really?? :O Wives are cheaper?? I don't think so... but I will have to get someone and then get married to find out ;)

    BTW, your praise is really heartwarming! Thanks a lot! :)

    Sunshine, well-cerebrated, eh? See, I told you --- I too have brains :)

    And the prof from one university will not recommend you if you leave unfinished business there! ;) Commitment, lady... agar sab ne bhi haa keh diya, sirf ek pe hi dil aata hai!

  4. Nice post. Many people here in Delhi go to the univ area only for the ambience:-
    When you go the univ and college
    Such tenedencies tend to come of age
    Whether or not you are a rage
    The response from the other side is difficult to gauge
    If positive, its like a worker receiving his first wage
    Having made me nostalgic, it was a pleasure to read your blogpage.

  5. That was some post. A very interesting comparision drawn between the two.


  6. Hiren, I'm honoured, sire...
    By your lyrics and by what you admire
    And I dare mention here
    That I'd like to see more of you in my blog-sphere!

    Sky, ahh... thanks, madam! But the comparison was just interesting? :)

  7. Yes. You are 'in'. No doubt an achievement. I know you are elated. Me too -happy in your happiness. However, you and I -we both know the course thereafter is no bed of roses. You need to put in hours of sincere study, toil, research, devotion, and dedication and the University, acclaimed universally, will not be behind in rewarding you. You reap the fruits of the seeds you sow with strain and toil, effort and exercise.
    Not necessarily so with the girlfriend dear. She is generally an elusive entity. Knowing full well your elated state, she might wield the whip. She might comply with your warmth and friendship and condescend to remain your friend. Or she might wait, watch, study and reveal partial shades of her entity guided by the nuances of the feminine psyche. And if she is given to whimsicality, the case is worse. You might the victim of her 'whimsical agitations'.
    I'm sure, the University too shall wait , watch and study your efforts, shall be discriminative and penetrating and critical and judicious, but not whimsical. It will think twice before making a decision. However, remember - merit along with hard work never go unrewarded.

  8. Maa, yes, timely advice coming in on both fronts from you --- I can see. But it is more up to the person to think and be able to discriminate. It requires a lot of mental maturity, yes, but lets hope that things work out well on either front.

  9. To summarize what ur mom said " beta, plz study no gf and all"

  10. Anomynous, you got it wrong. She wants me to get my priorities right, and to discriminate and follow my conscience.

  11. Whoa, your mum comes up with some solid advice, huh?:) Got to love them!

  12. Duhita, yes, she always does... that is why she is my mom! ;)


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