Friday, June 09, 2006

Hell hath no fury...

... like a woman scorned. To be precise, like a girl who has just been told why she is not good wife-y material. Let me explain:

I was having this chat conversation about a couple of days ago with a girl. Ok, once you are done with your smirk, raised eyebrows and cheeky smiles, read ahead. The conversation drifted to her life and why arranged marriages spoilt the charm that love marriages seem to have. Arranged marriages, it seemed to her, were just like going to a market and buying vegetables --- the romantic magic disappeared. She was unhappy that she had still not been swept off her feet permanently [read that line again, 'permanently']. So, after some time, she asked me, "Why do you think I may not be good 'wifey' material for you ?".

The conversation went as follows:
Her: Why do you think I may not be good 'wifey' material for you?
Me: I haven't actually given it a thought
Her: Don't tell me! Anyway, think and tell me now
Me: I haven't really thought.... But well, in that case, I will have to think of the negative qualities you have and then decide. As for example, for a start....

Naah, I'm not telling you what 3 crazy reasons I could tell her off my head at the moment. In fact, one of them turned out to be a good reason to marry her after some consideration. But well, that was not the point. Listen on to what followed after that

Her: That was hilarious!!
Me: Yeah, but make sure the guy you marry does not discover the two things I mentioned right now. As soon as you find him, rush him to the altar, and get married! Let the poor guy find out later on :))
Her: Man, you have made a big dent in my ego by telling all those things.
Me: Uh-oh, you asked for it!

After some time it appeared that what was said in jest had hurt her in some miniscule way. Now, that called for some consolation. So, I proceeded about the task like this:

Me: Ok, ok, just to settle scores, tell me some reasons why I may not be good husband/bf material for you or anybody else.
Her: Naa re... who says so! You will be great husband/bf material
Me: You sure? You are losing a great chance here
Her: Ahh... what am I saying! No, there are reasons why you will not be good husband material
Me: Like?
Her: Well, first of all, you are going to get a PhD. And I don't want a mad PhD for my husband.
[I had a good laugh at this one]
Me: Hmm... looks like that can't be helped. Go on
Her: Then, you are too kat-khotta, too cold and practical at times
[That, actually, has some truth to it. I mean, I have been told that by different people at different times. Given a choice between 2 hours of romantic whispering and gup-shup with a girl, and 2 hours of full-fledged banter and leg-pulling with her, the second one is an almost obvious choice for me]
Me: That is actually true to some extent. Go ahead!
Her: Then, you don't praise me a lot
Me: Huh? What has that got anything to do with being a boyfriend or a husband?
Her: No, you have to make the other person feel special and important.
[Now this was an important lesson learnt. I do really reserve comments and when I do praise people, it is from the heart. But well, lets see if things can improve a bit ;) ]
Me: Well, ok, thats news for me...
Her: Finally, you are from the RK Mission. And I have known that people from these places are the religious type. I don't want to be stuck with someone like that

This last one sent me thinking. I questioned myself: how religious am I? Or, for that matter, how exactly do I define the term, 'religious'? I am actually proud of the fact that I have been exposed to religious ceremonies, japas and meditation and stuff. I proudly wear my sacred thread around my torso. But then I realised what she meant. She hated the types that would make everybody around them fast because he was fasting. The type of men who would scream sacrilege if you happen to touch them when they have just bathed. I am not that type... religion is important to me, but humans come first for me and then the idols or the Ones they represent.

Anyway, the conversation went on for some time after that. I had not been able to answer that religious question suitably then, but I hope that this one is now answered. But the reason behind this post is not that -- that is a secondary reason. The primary reason is to ask you readers to conjecture what two crazy reasons might have goaded her into this tirade of attack against me. :)

18 comments:

  1. Was she specifically asked only to mention 3-4 reasons? If not, I can already think of a few more (knowing you for the time I have).

    You promise a girl you'll bring her chocolates from Europe and meet her as well, and then you gulp it all on your own since you were unable to meet her? I mean that is fine, but you could at least have sounded sorry about it and promised to get her more chocolates (or diamonds) later.

    You actually seem the sturdy no non-sense type. Sometimes women really like men who are a bit on the dreaming side. Sometimes. After all, no one wants to lie under the starlit sky with her beloved gazing at the moon when he exclaims, "Oh, what is your opinion about the chemical content of the rocks on the moon?"

    There are a few more that are kindve personal, so won't comment here. But yes, theres another. You must get out of the habit of... err... soaps, buckets, scrubs... ahem!!!

    That was quite a post.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1. Doing a PhD. A guy so dedicated is definitely husband material.

    2. Cold and Practical. A guy who can freeze you with his words. Trust me, its these guys that women like. Thats awesome boyfriend material. Not husband material, sorry. Husbands must be all mushy and comfortable. How to transform the cold man to a nice hubby is the woman's job :-)

    3. Honesty. Thats the best thing you could ever ask for.

    4. A guy who is actually a part of RKM, ties a sacred thread, is doing a PhD and is honest. Wow. I'm impressed!

    What is wrong with this girl?!

    ReplyDelete
  3. not to answe ur question but to mention otherwise an observation....an empirical truth......it generally happens that when you have such kind of talks with some girl/boy (as the case may be) you mostly end up in a realtionship with him/her! :)
    Age tum khud samajdar ho!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Glad to find that sanity still exists on this earth.

    In your form that is :)

    You may not eventually get that girl, sorry that girl might not be good enough for you. But I have a feeling that you have a much more larger female following now with this post and somewhere in some corner I can imagine you with a beaming smile on the success of this post. What success?! I think you know.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I agree too with Nikhil...:)

    And thanks for inspiring me for my next post...the whole "My compliments are genuine and hence difficult to come by" notion that the guys have made needs to be addressed...recurring problem with Dodo too..;-) so high time, I take it in my errr...able hands!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sunshine, I think she stopped at these 4-5 reasons. Maybe a second conversation will provide more insights :)

    About the chocolates: how and why am I supposed to apologise if the girl does not show up on time? If I had been in her place -- I would have ditched everything around me to grab free European chocolates!

    And yes, about the moonlit sky stuff --- sorry, I would rather prefer a silence of a couple of hours under the starry sky with her than discuss chemical compositions! Silence speaks volumes, you know!

    P.S. - Thanks! Compliments are always welcome! ;)

    Selma, hey! Change of name! By the way, I am beginning to feel good about all that here! I have been able to impress a girl with just my credentials!! Aww... I am so glad that I posted this.

    To the girl with whom I had this conversation: Hear! Hear!

    P.S. - Nice pic on your profile :)

    Manasi, hmm... ab to baat serious turn lene lag gayi! Well, if something really turns up some day, you'll receive a special comment on your blog. :)

    Nikhil, Ahh, finally some support from the most misunderstood gender! Thank you very much!

    Female following? I am not just beaming a smile, I am grinning from ear to ear right now since you have said that!

    The girl is not good enough for me? Hey! Girl! Did you hear that one? :))

    Ellie, wow! thanks! Your next post is now a must-read for me.

    Now, ain't I good at inspiring creativity in girls?? :D

    ReplyDelete
  7. ah! matrimony..btw i am yet to come across a matrimonial which is self disparaging..like

    lazy
    stentorian snorer
    impecunious

    On a more serious note sometimes 10 reasons might not matter and sometimes a single might be enough.

    ReplyDelete
  8. How would you feel???....
    "standing on a bridge with your beloved whom u meet once in 6 months...he admiring the colourful sunset n asking for ur views on the beautiful sunset...
    Answer:ya..i know thats dispersion...do u remember the spectrum...on which end was the red light measuring by wavelength??"
    Well this is a true story!!!How would u react if u were the admirer of the sunset?? :-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anubhav, yeah... well, you can start a trend bby publishing that on your matrimonial ad! :)

    And I agree with your idea of 10 reasons and the one. It must be rather a matter of connecting.

    Bristi, wow! I sure would like to meet this gal! But yes, if this lady actually decides to play spoilsport, I can maybe have a good discussion about the particle and wave nature of light :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. bhai means u have time for chatting so when are we chatting ;)

    ReplyDelete
  11. i didnt get my answer but...By the way she was not at all being a spoilsport.....It was just an impromptu response...u never know..may b she repented later.May b she had a bad time with with physics so it has become a nightmare with her!!!How men draw instant conclusions...my my!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Varun, yeah I am online sometimes on google chat. We can chat whenever we do that at the same time!

    Bristi, Hmm... good observation! I would be taken aback for a second, thats all. The rest, I assure you, will be history.

    BTW, about the instant conclusion bit, Welcome to the world of men!

    Another sample instant conclusion: The girl you mentioned about is not you!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Taken aback????Well that is an understatement..Your male ego would have been shattered...dumbstruck for a moment...the rest only u can tell!!ha ha (jus kidding)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Bristi, Tu beaker ko jar kahe jar kahenge! :D

    ReplyDelete
  15. Tu sharab ko pani kahe pani kahenge:-)..so when r u resuming ur studies???What r ur subjects of specialisation?

    ReplyDelete
  16. hey nice blog man.
    Hey i read u worked in accenture , if its not a problem could you temme abt ur Exp. in the Organisation.
    Thx :) nd keep bloggin

    ReplyDelete
  17. hear hear girl! make your choice fast! hehe :-D

    ReplyDelete
  18. Bristi, ok, we now know where to ask the right questions! :)

    Sirius, hey, thanks man! I think I have already published an article aboutworking in accenture... let me see if I can post it here.

    Selma, hey! Thanks! :)

    ReplyDelete

The last word... never accept defeat until you see yourself dead.