One way of looking at marriage is to think that you are moving in with a room-mate of the opposite sex. The way we speak, the content, the choice of words, the topics - all of them are novel and unique and are fascinating to understand and observe. "Understand" may be an overstatement here, though. We mortals merely seek to understand the quirks of the opposite sexes' mind. In corporate lingo, "strategic alignment of priorities and cohesive engagement in synergy of visions" needs to happen. To paraphrase, the two must see things in the same light.
Take, for example, the concept of a dress. Or rather, what to wear. In spite of all the evidence you may cite, as a general rule, guys don't care about what they wear as much as women do. Yes there are carefully careless girls out there and so are smart and well-groomed men, but we are talking averages here. More importantly, guys do not notice what other guys are wearing. Actually it is more like something not even worth looking into for guys. Who cares what she was wearing? Was it a bikini - no. Well then, I don't remember the colour of her salwar. Girls on the other hand do actively notice what others are wearing, though. In a way, I think they are able to appreciate the effort that other girls have put into getting "ready" with all the make-up and all. Guys suffer from no such compunction. That is why we are perfectly happy with living through the entire semester or year with just three T-shirts and a pair of jeans. Case in point: look at this cartoon of unspoken communication.
This post is not to rehash this stereotype, though. It is to complain about the fact that my wife's thoughts are now getting into my own head. We discuss people, their dresses, their cars, their food orders at the restaurant, etc. It is actually fun to make up reasons behind why that kid is wailing or who said what at Rachel and Ross' wedding. :) There are certain things I generally don't think about and get around such questions with politically correct answers. Unfortunately, enough conversation on a topic makes you think about it anyway. I bet now you are wondering why the school history syllabus had so much detail about the Communist Party of India. Given enough time, then, enough information can even be gathered by an Englishman at a Chinese help desk booth, let alone I who is of far greater intellect.
Unfortunately, the "training" doesn't stop when I am alone and not with my wife. At random moments, I have found myself analyzing others' dresses at a shopping mall or a grocery store. "Hm - those shoes aren't really that nice with that dress". "Oh wow, that green outfit with the green matching ear-rings". And the moment of self-realization is really a moment of a virtual newspaper rolled up in my hand and going "thwack" on my own head... "Dude!! What are you thinking?!!".
It is bewildering, really - why, what, how, why... why am I thinking about this? What will I do with this information? And why do I even stand here to judge this person who I don't even know? Hm that guy's red shirt with white trousers is an eye-catcher... oh wait.... darn-it! Thwack!
